September 17, 2005: Tony and I adopted Lucy on 25 March 2001 when she was about 13 weeks old. She's a mixed Spaniel/Dachshund/Labrador, although we don't see any Spaniel in her at all. She has 10 other siblings, all adopted out to good homes. She has a long body, taller legs than a Dachshund, and the face of a Lab. She's a small dog, weighing about 30 pounds. Her siblings range from 12 to 60 pounds. She's been a joy. In June 2001, she fractured her hind leg and wore a cast for 5 weeks. She loves to go for walks in the park and visit with other dogs at Petsmart. Yes, she is spoiled but happy dog!
In December, Dawn, who adopted Lucy's sister Reilly, had a birthday party for both girls. Yes, there were other doggie guests, hats, party favors, and even a doggie cake (not too bad, actually). Here are a few photos of the birthday girls. And no, there won't be any future birthday parties.
Subject: Pet Rules
To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door -- nose height.
Dear Dogs and Cats,
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate of food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep.
It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!
To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:
To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.
Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
Eat less.
Don't ask for money all the time.
Usually come when called.
Never drive your car.
Don't hang out with drug-using friends.
Don't smoke or drink.
Don't worry about having to buy the latest fashions.
Don't wear your clothes.
Don't need a gazillion dollars for college.
If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.
